Have you ever had one of those days, weeks, months, years where everything that could go wrong, seemed to go wrong??? I was almost (emphasis on the almost) at that place last week. Over the past several months I have been trying to work on me and my shoes (AKA: issues). A couple of times a month, I see my therapist. I like to call this, “Me Time.” I get to tell someone all of my stuff and she has to listen to me. That’s what she’s paid to do. Not only does she listen, but she responds (in a very non-judgmental, unbiased way). Without going into too much detail, I’m looking at how I got to where I am today and what I need/want to do to change some things that aren’t quite working for me anymore.
It’s working…I’m feeling better about life in general, but there are always going to be those cruddy days. Last week was a cruddy week. I went through my finances and started doing my taxes. Oh LORD…those are two very difficult subjects, right??? Then to top it off, my heel was still (at the time) hurting and I needed to see my doctor again. And, on top of that, the scale wasn’t being very cooperative. All of those things made me hungry.
You see, food and I have this love/hate relationship. I love the taste and how it makes me feel when I eat, but I hate what the junk does to me and the guilt/shame I have after I have the love affair. I turn to food to celebrate, when I’m angry, when I’m sad, when I’m nervous, when I’m…I think you get the picture. My hunger is masked as physical, but I’m learning how to identify when it’s emotional hunger I’m actually experiencing. Check out this graphic that has been floating around the web-o-sphere lately:
Finding this graphic couldn’t have come at a better time. It really helped me identify what kind of hunger I was having. I will be referencing this table over and over as I continue in my journey. Number 7 is what I seem to struggle with the most when I feel emotional hunger. Sometimes I feel like I can’t satisfy my hunger. Several months ago this was still very frustrating, but I’m learning ways to deal with the “not full” feeling. I definitely have much more work to do, but day by day, and step by step, I’m getting control over my eating and emotional responses. Knowledge is power and being aware of what my mind does and how I respond is a big step in addressing some of these “shoes” I’m working on!